The Day My Mom Got Married

by katrina perdue

In October of 2012, my mom lost her loving husband and partner of 33 years. An incredible man - my dad. 


Since then, our family has gone through unimaginable heartache and change. We’ve been on a journey that felt endless at times - ripe with tears and sadness, fueled by fond memories and the kind of energy that is only made possible by sharing physical space together. Living 500 miles apart makes those moments few and far between, but we do what we can. 


I’ve likened this journey to a kind of battle, but then at some point along the way I realized it was just life happening as it should. We all experience love and loss. It is inevitable. Sometimes these events are tightly coupled - tighter than we might like. Suffocating. We fight it - we go through a process that can seem so lonely, dark, and endless. And then one day - the light shines in. Maybe it is brief and small - a glimpse - but it’s there. It fades and returns. It seems to disappear, and then one day it blinds us. We see happiness that at one point we thought was impossible. We feel love again. It takes a new form, but it feels familiar. It feels good. Life is happening. 


Yesterday my mom got married. Her journey has been messy and intensely beautiful, like life should be. There is hope in her again that was difficult to see for some time. I was sitting in the hospital room the day my dad told her that he wanted her to move on. He hoped she would find someone else to love and live the rest of her life with. It was one of the saddest, most raw and strangely beautiful moments I’ve ever witnessed. I know now that she has found that someone. And that somewhere - wherever one goes after leaving this earth - a beautiful soul is smiling.